24 Million Reasons We're All Screwed...

Ebert And Roper called it one of the worst movies they'd ever seen. No one without several lobotomy scars couldn't agree that it's one of the worst concept pieces of crap that's ever been trotted out there. Even still, 'Monster-In-Law' made $24 million dollars in its opening weekend.

How depressing is it that this drivel rakes in all that scratch? Put it together with 'Meet The Fockers' now being the HIGHEST GROSSING COMEDY OF ALL TIME and it's just hopeless.

If you taught a retarded dog to laugh at footage of it eating its own vomit, you may start to understand the average American's sense of humor. These are people who cry laughing every time Larry The Cable guy says 'Git-R-Done', or every time they see that comic mastermind Paris Hilton give up on another fast food job.

I'm sure the only reason this movie didn't break every box office record on the books is all the red-state husbands that refused to go along because they hate that ding-dang traitor Hanoi Jane so much. Hopefully Gallagher will tour again soon so they don't have to go without laughing for too long.