Back when I was a kid, Blogs were called 'imaginary friends' and were only slightly more pathetic.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

This Week's SFist Reprint, Or "Take That, Successful Business!"

Since there’s so many places that went to all the trouble of getting a liquor license, Barrespondent Drew feels like it’s his responsibility to try them all out. And even if he doesn’t get a Nobel Prize for it, getting drunk is an acceptable consolation.

Since we live in such an unfortunate time when most people have to work for a living, the ‘after work’ bar is an unfortunate necessity of life. All those ‘nine to fivers’ have to go somewhere, so we guess it’s for the best that they have overpriced, chain restaurant-style places scattered all over the Financial District to grab a few pops in before heading home.

Sure, there’s a couple of gems and historic landmarks scattered around the Downtown area, but it seems the further you creep up toward The Embarcadero, the prices tend to creep up too, along with the chances that everyone you’re drinking with is just killing time before they catch their train back to Concord (If you’re from Concord and that statement offends you, just substitute Pleasanton or something). We brave one of these suburbanite-friendly time killers after the jump.

Gordon Biersch, conveniently located on the corner of ‘Sales Meeting’ and ‘Secretary’s Lunch’, is a living testament to what happens to a decent brewing company when the Starbuck’s business model is liberally applied. The space is big and loud, the waitresses good looking and personality free, and the food as non-threatening as it is uninteresting.

But, Mr. Staggering Man, none of things should've had anything to do with why you were there, right? It should've been all about the beer. After all, along with Anchor Steam and Pyramid, Gordon Biersch was at the forefront of the microbrew revolution of the early nineties. And while we will admit that their beer is actually pretty good, all this other noise just gets in the way of enjoying it.

According to Dan Gordon and Dean Biersch (not to be confused with Dean and Gene Ween), when they created the place way back in ’87, they wanted to create a ‘monument to beer’, but unfortunately this place is just a monument to tacky capitalism. Another cookie-cutter chain restaurant custom made to eventually spread out to every suburban mini-mall in the country that isn’t already crammed full of Applebee’s, Outbacks and Ruby Tuesday’s.

So unless you’re really worried that a bar with any personality would offend your senses or you’re such a beer snob that only a Marzen will do, let Dan and Dean have the suburbs, and get your libations elsewhere.

Liver… Out!!

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