Back when I was a kid, Blogs were called 'imaginary friends' and were only slightly more pathetic.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Scott McClellan Finally Gets The Kick To The Nuts He's So Richly Deserved

Well, contrary to what complete pessimists like me thought, the White House Press Corps actually grew a pair yesterday and called Press Secretary Scott McClellan on the stinky mound of bullshit he's been piling up over the last year and a half. Thank god they wouldn't allow him to get away with personally vouching for Karl Rove's innocence in 2003 but now refusing to talk about an ongoing investigation.

So, game over, right? Wrong. Like Rick James after getting kicked in the chest by Charlie Murphy, the NeoCons continue to be 'habitual line-steppers' and don't seem to learn a goddamn thing. Cocaine's a hell of a drug.

In what has to go down as the saddest, most laughable defense of something indefensible yet (and the list is real long at this point), the right's official position seems to be; a) it wasn't illegal to begin with, b) Valerie Plame wasn't really a covert operative, and c) that Rove was merely trying to point out factual innacuracies that might call into question someone trying to make dispariging comments about our wonderful President.

The problem with all these takes is that they don't even answer the question that's being asked, which is, "Is the President going to fire 'anyone in his administration linked to this' like he said he would, or is it just another lie that he told to shut reporters up? There can be no doubt about it, if Karl Rove is not fired, our President is a liar, pure and simple.

Also, to subscribe to the right's head-shakingly idiotic defenses above, you need to also believe that the ENTIRE CIA, The special prosecutor, all the judges who reviewed the classified documents in the contempt cases, McClellan, Wilson, Plame, and PRESIDENT BUSH HIMSELF were ALL WRONG. It seems like a little more than a stretch to ask people to ignore everyone one of those people that have said that Plame's outing was a crime just because Rove's weasel-ass is in hot water and suddenly right-wing bloggers and Tucker Carlson think there's no crime here. To all the right wing spin-meisters, I ask this. Is your credibility and sense of simple ethics and honesty so valueless that you would give them all up to protect Karl Freaking Rove?

Personally, I think Rove is a bitter little toad who's decided to get back at everyone who pulled down his shorts on the playground and chanted 'fatty-fatty-fat-fat' by ruining the world. I would love to see him go to 'big fat dick-in-the-ass' federal prison. But most progressive people I've seen would be content if the administration just fired him and finally admitted for once that they made one damn mistake. It would truly be a watershed event to watch Bush have to do something besides give a medal to members of his administration that have fucked shit up. It might even give me a little bit of hope (a little).

It's this kind of out of control hubris that will eventually bring this entire administration (and indeed the already proven monumentally wrong Neo-Conservative movement) down like a house of cards. Admitting a mistake every once in awhile shows humanity, confidence in your ability to fix things that are broken, and a willingness to think creatively. Sticking to your guns and continuing to shout that two plus two equals five shows nothing more than the arrogant immaturity of a 3-year old who is unable to comprehend something as simple as 'too much ice cream gives you a bellyache' and then keeps eating it until he vomits.

So, right wing idiots, keep feeding your president ice cream. Just don't come crying to us when you get sprayed in a shower of half-digested Cherry Garcia. We put on our 'Gallagher' tarps a long time ago and have desperately tried over the last five years to convince you to do the same.

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