Take Two. Try It With Less Tripe Photos This Time.

Menudo?! But there's Tripe in that too!!

Ok, let’s try this again. It would have been much less disheartening if the thing that was deleted yesterday was something silly like ‘name 10 random songs on your IPod' or some such nonsense, but when you bear your freaking soul, exposing all your slobbering demons to any and all who point and click, only to have it erased into the ether like it never existed at all, it causes you to question the existence of God, and then question whether or not that God is bored with your bullshit and deleting your emails without even reading them. Oh well, whatever, start again.

This questionairre comes courtesy of a person who suffers from the awful malady of being born without merit. Where’s their Special Olympics?

Here goes;

1. What were three of the stupidest things you have done in your life?

It probably wasn’t the best use of my time to spend two years at Long Beach State University enrolling for classes, collecting a big student loan check and then dropping out and spending said check on booze and videogames. Nope, that was real dumb. Second place is a massive tie between a hundred poorly thought out things I did during college trying to get laid. Note to self, "Writing other people’s term papers ALWAYS lands you in the ‘friend zone’". And third, another bottleneck tie of stupidity consisting of quite a few drunk driving incidents. I never got arrested or in an accident or anything, but let’s just say that driving through Orange County in 1994 while yakking out the driver’s side window was not something I’d most like to be remembered for.

2. At the current moment, who has the most influence in your life?

My wife, and I mean that in the best possible way (aww..)

3. If you were given a time machine that functioned, and you were allowed to only pick up to five people to dine with, who would you pick?

Lee Harvey Oswald, Amy Sedaris, Ben Franklin, and the two fat motorcycle guys from the Guiness Book of World Records. For all the obvious reasons.

4. If you had three wishes that were not supernatural, what would they be?

Not supernatural? So that eliminates everything but just asking someone to go get you something! Well, I don’t want to be a pain in the ass, so I guess I’ll ‘wish’ for a delicious sandwich for lunch, my dentist appointment to go smoothly later today and for the upcoming Fantastic Four movie not to suck too much.

5. Someone is visiting your hometown/place where you live at the moment. Name two things you regret your city not having, and two things people should avoid.

I regret that Oakland doesn’t have, a) white people, and b) a better bar scene. As far as what people should avoid; a) the area between Fruitvale and San Leandro and b) the rest of the city.

6. Name one event that has changed your life.

Here’s where I could say more sappy stuff about my wife, but I won’t dammit. Instead, I’ll say the year I spent at NYU. It was truly mind-blowing for a suburban kid from Seattle to go live in Greenwich Village pretty much sight unseen. Most of the friends that I still keep in contact with are ones I met through there and even though I don’t use one bit of what I learned there, it was still unbelievably enriching. Oh yeah, and expensive, which is why I didn’t go for 2 years.

7. Tag 5 people.

Alright, I’ll tag 5 people, but I’m gonna make it real clear that they don’t have to fill this out and that it’s really more of a ‘If you can pull yourself away from work or something you’ve really been meaning to do like clean under the refrigerator’ type of thing.

Jeff at Derelict Junction
C. Magma at Tulgeywood
John at Ribaldry & Schmaltz
Scaramouche
Mags at You Forgot Poland

Phew! Obligation fulfilled!!