Back when I was a kid, Blogs were called 'imaginary friends' and were only slightly more pathetic.

Monday, February 07, 2005

Jose Can You See...

This finger can bench 300 pounds!!

Alright, NOW it's getting good. Jose Canseco has officially called out all y'all motherf*ckers that were shootin' each other up like cross-dressing vegas junkie showgirls all throughout the '80s and '90s. Let the bidding begin for a Lifetime movie featuring these scenes:

- "Canseco mixed, matched and experimented to such a degree that he became known throughout the league as 'The Chemist"."

- "Canseco said he, McGwire and Jason Giambi shot steroids into each other in the bathroom stall at the Oakland Coliseum."

- "Canseco said he introduced Texas teammates Rafael Palmeiro, Ivan Rodriguez and Juan Gonzalez to steroids after being traded to the Rangers in 1992."

And the icing on the gravy:

- "Canseco also said President Bush, the Rangers' general managing partner at the time, must have known about the steroid use.".

When reached for comment, McGwire, Giambi, Palmeiro, IRod and Juan Gone all shook off their feeding bucket and starting bucking all crazy-like until their handler calmed them down with a sugar cube.

The White House's reaction was to accuse the person asking the question of being racist against the Secretary of State and Attorney General.



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