Happy Trails, Dick!!

Joyous news! Seems that Tucker Carlson's been fired. Here's my eulogy:

Tucker Carlson, he was kind of obnoxious. No, wait, he was really obnoxious. He was like every silver-spoon fed tittie-suckin' momma's boy conservative douche nozzle that's in every community college 'intro to Poli-Sci' class. You know, the guy who immediately thinks he's smarter than the professor because he listens to Limbaugh. I don't remember wanting to slap my television nearly as much before Tucker made his first appearance on it. Even his name, Tucker, just made you want to wring the life out of his neck. The thought of punching him in the stomach made me smile.

Oh yeah, and he wears a bow tie.