...On Fruitcake and The Existence of God

Ah, Public Transportation. Where else can you sit next to someone, be completely convinced that they're having a cellphone conversation, and then slowly realize that they're completely fucking nuts?

This morning on the rolling despair machine known as AC Transit bus #82, a man seated next to me started talking. Now his cadence made me think there was someone answering him. He'd say a few things, listen for awhile and then respond. Only after about 5 minutes, and starting to pay attention to the things he was saying did I realize that the only person responding to him was the slightly less crazy guy living in his head slowly feasting on his brain.

Here is something close to an exact transcript of what he said;

"Yeah?"

"That sure is right."

"Those Ay-Rabs at 7-11 should stop selling fruitcake."

"I said those Ay-Rabs at 7-11 should stop selling fruitcake. It's nuts enough without the
fruitcake."

"Yeah, the Ay-Rabs."

"You know a snake's got a tongue that looks like two fingers. Two fingered snake tongue."

"Reminds me of those bastards at 7-11."

Unfortunately at that point he had to get off the bus. No doubt to hit the local 7-11 for some delicious fruitcake served up by the middle eastern snake gentlemen that work there.

And they said it was a bad idea to shut down half the mental hospitals and turn them loose on the streets? Hogwash! Imagine what a crashing bore our city's public transportation systems would be without 'em.