This just in...comedy

Dimitri Martin and Eugene Mirman are the two funniest comics that hardly anyone's heard of. That's most likely because they spend all their time in NYC and never tour to great places like the 'Giggleshack' in Columbus, Ohio. While I'm at it, I might as well make a list of the top 30 standup comics of all time. In my pompous and rude opinion:

Dave Attell, David Cross, Patton Oswalt, Richard Pryor, Bill Hicks, Louis CK, Mitch Hedburg, Wanda Sykes, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle, Eddie Murphy, Drew Carey, Ray Romano, Jerry Seinfeld, Steve Martin, Jonathan Katz, Jim Gaffigan, Rodney Dangerfield, Richard Belzer, Norm MacDonald, Colin Quinn, Marc Maron, Janeane Garofalo, Steve Martin, Eugene Mirman, Demitri Martin, Lenny Bruce, Todd Barry, Sarah Silverman, and from Hollywood, Andy Kaufman

Up and comer, barely missed the list:
GREG GIRALDO